Couples & Families
Couples & Families
Couples counselling supports individuals in intimate relationships. Therapy may be helpful for partners considering separation or seeking improved intimacy and understanding. While the relationship itself is the focus in couples counselling, each partner is expected to pay attention to individual growth and self-awareness. Partners may gain a deeper understanding of how they each contribute to the relational dynamics and learn more helpful ways of behaving and interacting with each other. Most partners report increased insight into relational patterns, improved emotional expression, communication skills, and problem-solving abilities. It is important to understand that the goal is not always to ensure partners stay together. Instead couples/partner therapy can help individuals find positive ways to end relationships that are no longer working.
Family Therapy
Family therapy can help improve communication and resolve conflicts between partners, children, parents, caregivers, or other family members. It may include all family members or only those willing or able to participate in therapy. Small changes by individual family members can often translate into significant changes in family functioning. Family therapy can be useful in any family situation that causes conflict, stress, anger, or grief. It can help family members understand one another better and bring them closer together. Our clinicians use systemic therapies to help support couples and families and to allow each person to develop insight into their contribution to the shared dynamics.
Family systems therapy is an approach to support conflict resolution within the family unit. It is based on the belief that all family members contribute to the family dynamic and therefore can collaboratively work together to examine how the family is functioning in a healthy or dysfunctional way.
During family systems therapy, the entire family unit works together to solve problems that are happening between one or more family members. It is essential that the family works together as a team. Each family member will discuss the issues occurring within the family unit and will express how those issues are affecting them. Together, the family explores and resolves the problems they have been facing. In family systems therapy, you might participate in role-playing exercises where you switch roles to see how other members of your family feel. The goal is to restore familial relationships and restore a healthy family system that functions well through helping each person to see a perspective different from their own.
Family Systems Therapy
Parenting Skills Training
Children are wonderful, demanding, unreasonable, ego-centric, and usually resilient human beings who place a unique set of demands on their parents and caregivers. Sometimes our own issues or experiences of being parented can interfere with our ability to effectively understand or respond to our children. Resources (time, money, extended family input) can be limited and parents can find themselves feeling overwhelmed, confused, angry, or defeated. We offer parenting skills training and home-based “Super-Nanny” style interventions to help families get back on track.
Mediation
Couples mediation is a process which facilitates clear communication and opens the door for challenging discussions and potential negotiations to explore outcomes to which both parties can give their commitment. This process allows both parties to express their views in a private, safe, and skilfully managed environment. This approach is a compassionate and sensitive way of dealing with relationship challenges. It aims to bring about healing and respectful communication whether or not couples continue to remain together. It is also more private and less expensive than using attorneys. In the event that couples are going through the courts, mediation can be very relevant in bringing about healing and understanding in very difficult circumstances. Mediation is about developing skills that will empower people to find solutions.
In mediation, the mediator acts as a neutral party and facilitates a conversation between the two parties involved to discuss their concerns and have a dialogue around topics which have previously been difficult or non-productive. The aim of mediation is for both parties to discover their values currently masked by threats, which they might experience from the other party as well as become aware of the defend-attack patterns which take place between the two of them. The mediator’s role is to help parties tell their stories, explore underlying interests and concerns, and generate options for solving problems and reaching agreements. The hope is that once the parties have engaged in this process, they are able to learn from each other as well as learn more about themselves to open up space for creating options. Couples mediation can last between 4-6 sessions anywhere between 2- 3 hours per session depending on the complexity of the issues.
Divorce coaching is a highly effective intervention for both partners wherever they are in the process of the divorce. Solstice has two divorce coaches – one male, one female – who typically work together to support couples through the separation process.
The divorce coach offers a model in which a couple can avoid the biggest mistakes of a divorce and can help prevent the separation process from becoming antagonistic and expensive. They work with the couple to discover and set boundaries; create an action plan; and provide support throughout the process.
Clients develop the ability to separate emotions and make rational decisions; to set appropriate boundaries; and to create better relationships for ex-partners and any children involved.